What Would Happen If You Disconnected From Email?

Take a trip with me. You have your smartphone and you unlink your email settings from your email server, making it impossible to receive email on your smartphone. You could probably still access your email via the browser on your smartphone — but that is so time-consuming, you'd rather not.

Your last email to your team, clients, and colleagues is to let them know you will be checking email at regular intervals during the day while you are at the office and if there is an actual emergency, to call you on your smartphone. But for all intents and purposes, you are not reading or responding to emails when you're not in the office.

What would happen?

1. You might get a few more phone calls.

But that's not a terrible thing. Instead of getting into a viscious email communication chain on some obscure topic, you can probably handle it with a quick 3-5 minute call. And you can group your callbacks and keep them short.

2. You get more organized and focused when you did access your email at the office.*

Initially, it would build up. But as team members, clients, and colleagues would notice, email would cease to be a primary communication vehicle for you. Since you only had a limited amount of time to read your email, you would only focus on those emails that were from key members of your team or were directly sent to you. Anything else most likely can fall by the wayside. *I totally understand if you spend 90-100% of your time away from the office — your smartphone is critical. But what would happen if you just checked emails when you opened your laptop? Or if you checked your smartphone at discreet times during the day and not ALL the time?

3. You would get slower replying to email.

No more quick responses — email is not texting or twitter. In fact, I would ask you not to use those tools either. The whole idea is to limit interruptions to your day to be able to focus on the important and strategic things happening in your life. If it's tactical- or emergency-based use the phone.

4. You would get faster communicating with your staff, clients, and colleagues.

No more long-winded emails — no death-defying email chains that go on forever. Just small phone interruptions (or grouping of phone calls) to connect and engage, manage, or inform. You can get a reputation of fast phone calls, keep them to 1-2 minutes or less and focus on the task at hand and make decisions or take action. Email prolongs debate — how many times have you been put through the email wringer with various vicious email cycles?

A number of clients of mine have done this and they've found a significant lightening of their load AND they are getting more things done. Why?

Email is not a very good communication vehicle.

It takes a long time to compose an email, there are many instances when you do give direction and someone doesn't see it, or the email message is misconstrued in a way where you come of yelling or reprimanding. Bottom line - email is not 'two-way' communication — it's a broadcast medium. In fact, it's worse, when you run into CC: and BCC: transmissions of the same email.

These reactive responses deliver the wrong message — not promoting or pushing projects and people forward — they actually get into email ruts. Trust me — I've been there.

Finally, email turns into heroin for some people. You know who you are — reading your email constantly like a stock ticker — responding instantly to people. How much productivity is wasted with this type of communication? What might be a better way of communicating?

So if you're brave — try unlinking your email today. If you just want to try it, don't check your email at all today — have an email response: "I won't be able to check my email today on my phone, please call me if it's urgent."

Go for it.

I Got A Little Gold Star On My Homework Today.

"The highest compliment you can pay a career coach is they change your life for the better with results beyond what you imagine. This is what Rich did for me through a way of coaching that showed the path, outlined requirements and gave me the tools to do it. I also know he can do it again and do it for anyone. Rich is an invaluable resource." — Rob Petersen, President & Founder at BarnRaisers

Rob - Thank you! You are the best.

How To Win The Lottery Of Your Life.

From Jeb Corliss (professional skydiver and base jumper): Someone posted this on my page — "I think you should have a "lottery" to offer average "Joe Blows" like me, the opportunity to experience life on your scale. Especially towards the ones who appreciate life as immensely as you do."

I responded with this — That lottery exists :)

It's called hard work and sacrificing everything to live a dream. I started with nothing. I worked in a movie theater making $4 an hour. I ate ramen noodles and only spent money on jumping and nothing else. Anyone can do what I do but not by asking others to do it for you.

You have to get up off your ass and take some risks with your life. There is no safe way to do what I have done. At any turn I could have died and almost did many many times. But I kept taking the risks. I kept braking the bones. I kept watching my friends die. I never gave up and now here I am.

There is no magic leprechaun that's going to do it for you. You have to do it for your self and you have to be willing to take the risks and pay the consequences for your actions. Those consequences are pain, suffering and most likely death. So are you sure you want what I have. Because it's yours for the taking. Just grow some balls and do it.

To learn more about Jeb Corliss, check out his site, his facebook page, and his twitter page. What a guy!

The Hidden Secret Why Everyone Is Better Than You.

When you're a child, you develop an broad impression of great power in every adult you meet.

  • You think doctors know how to fix people.
  • Lawyers are so quick and know the law (and how to debate).
  • Teachers can recite facts until you're head explodes.
  • Scientists can produce rocket ships to the moon!

And then you grow up.

You encounter stupid doctors, bad lawyers, lazy teachers and careless scientists.

Somehow, dumb people are able to get through school, grab their degree, and steal that promotion.

Your next realization is how easy it is to overestimate people in general.

You think a job will be beyond your qualifications. You don't have the smarts, the knowledge, the experience. Everyone else is smarter than you. You feel like an idiot.

But in fact, you're smart . . . really smart. Just remember that. You have:

  • Everything you need - all the tools and techniques.
  • More experience than you think.
  • A deeper knowledge base in many areas they don't even know about.
  • A wider understanding of how to communicate and engage people.

And here's a deeper secret, you're probably better than them.

But they'll never let you know it.

"There are two types of people in this world. The doers and the complainers."

In 1998, aged 16, Gurbaksh Chahal dropped out of high school to work full time at his first venture, ClickAgents. ClickAgents was an advertising network focused on performance-based advertising. In 2000, ValueClick bought ClickAgents in a $40 million. In 2004, Chahal formed BlueLithium. BlueLithium specialized in behavioral targeting of banner advertising. In 2007, Yahoo bought Blue Lithium for $300 million.

This is a quote from Gurbaksh. He gets right to the point. He makes it happen.

I have two questions for you:

1. What's holding you back? Is it someone or something in your life? Or it it YOU?

2. What would life be like if you eliminated that obstacle?

Most obstacles are self-imposed. We grow things out of proportion. We make things bigger than they really are.

Do you think Gurbaksh let inner (or outer) obstacles get in his way?

I don't think so.

Why Is Everyone Acting Like A Child Today?

It's getting worse. I'm hearing it from both my business and corporate clients. There's a clear delineation between how people interact and how they run their business. Look — I coach CEO's, CMO's, SVP's, Executives, Attorneys, Doctors, Wall Street Financiers, Business Owners, etc. So I've seen it all.

5 Powerful Lessons From My Vacation - Part Two.

I didn't expect to write this post. But my last post, 5 Powerful Lessons From My Vacation, garnered so many comments with suggestions of other powerful lessons . . . I just had to do a Part Two!

5 Powerful Lessons From My Vacation.

I took 10 days off over the past week for a much needed vacation for me and my family. We made our way down to Maryland's eastern shore (to a family farm) and then made our way to visit Washington DC. Even though I was relaxing, I had a lot of time during our travels to think about what I learned during my vacation:

1. I disconnected from my practice.

I came back to 500+ emails — but I made sure prior to my vacation, to let all of my clients, colleagues and friends know I'd be gone and if they really needed to reach me, to call. No one called. The time away from email was energizing. Knowing every day that I could just get up and go for a swim, or a walk, or just sit and read gave me real clarity and focus.

It gave me the permission to clear out the cobwebs and focus on what really important — personally and professionally.

2. I watched people.

My disconnection allowed me to watch and engage people from all walks of life. It allowed me to see really bad service and really exceptional service during my time on the road. It

I walked around with a new sense of wonder — engaging people and asking them questions — how's your day going, what's it like to work here, do they ever see anyone famous, etc. It's amazing how animated people get when they someone takes a sincere interest in their life.

3. I built deeper connections with the people I love.

One of the most important things I did was to spend time with my family — my wife and two sons (ages 11 and 16). We had a lot of fun relaxing at the farm and then sightseeing in DC. My two favorites — seeing my 16 year old son act as tour guide while we were in DC (I was so proud) and my 11 year old son have so much fun cutting down bamboo at the farm (he is a dedicated Mythbusters fan and will tackle any project with aplomb).

In addition, I spent quality time with my life partner. She and I have known each other for over 33 years (married 22) and still learn new aspects of one another every day. This vacation grew us closer together.

4. I had time to learn.

I spent a portion of my time reading and enjoying books. I also engaged with my older brother, his wife and sons and learned a host of new things about the world around me. We didn't talk business — we talked more about the world and philosophy in general. When was the last time you did that?

5. I recharged my batteries.

Let me state — I was not 'powered-down' and in need of energy. I was okay — I was moving along just fine over the past eight months. But it's like hooking you up to a powerful energy source (as in The Avengers movie, during the fight between Iron Man and Thor - Thor hit Iron Man with a huge bolt of lightning - and suddenly, Iron Man's energy potential shot upwards of 400%).

It really got my mind working in higher gears and began to build up a reserve of energy to take me through the end of 2012. I am full of ideas and direction — stay tuned!

If you haven't gone on vacation — GO. You can afford the time away from work.

Nullam Vitae Nibh Un Odiosters

Quisque ligulas ipsum, euismod atras vulputate iltricies etri elit. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos himenaeos. Nulla nunc dui, tristique in semper vel, congue sed ligula. Nam dolor ligula, faucibus id sodales in, auctor fringilla libero. Pellentesque pellentesque tempor tellus eget hendrerit. Morbi id aliquam ligula. Aliquam id dui sem. Proin rhoncus consequat nisl, eu ornare mauris tincidunt vitae. Vestibulum sodales ante a purus volutpat euismod. Proin sodales quam nec ante sollicitudin lacinia. Ut egestas bibendum tempor. Morbi non nibh sit amet ligula blandit ullamcorper in nec risus. Pellentesque fringilla diam faucibus tortor bibendum vulputate. Etiam turpis urna, rhoncus et mattis ut, dapibus eu nunc. Nunc sed aliquet nisi. Nullam ut magna non lacus adipiscing volutpat. Aenean odio mauris, consectetur quis consequat quis, blandit a nunc. Sed orci erat, placerat ac interdum ut, suscipit eu augue. Nunc vitae mi tortor. Ut vel justo quis lectus elementum ullamcorper volutpat vel libero.

Donec volutpat nibh sit amet libero ornare non laoreet arcu luctus. Donec id arcu quis mauris euismod placerat sit amet ut metus. Sed imperdiet fringilla sem eget euismod. Pellentesque habitant morbi tristique senectus et netus et malesuada fames ac turpis egestas. Pellentesque adipiscing, neque ut pulvinar tincidunt, est sem euismod odio, eu ullamcorper turpis nisl sit amet velit. Nullam vitae nibh odio, non scelerisque nibh. Vestibulum ut est augue, in varius purus.

Proin dictum lobortis justo at pretium. Nunc malesuada ante sit amet purus ornare pulvinar. Donec suscipit dignissim ipsum at euismod. Curabitur malesuada lorem sed metus adipiscing in vehicula quam commodo. Sed porttitor elementum elementum. Proin eu ligula eget leo consectetur sodales et non mauris. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit.

Nunc tincidunt, elit non cursus euismod, lacus augue ornare metus, egestas imperdiet nulla nisl quis mauris. Suspendisse a pharetra urna. Morbi dui lectus, pharetra nec elementum eget, vulputate ut nisi. Aliquam accumsan, nulla sed feugiat vehicula, lacus justo semper libero, quis porttitor turpis odio sit amet ligula. Duis dapibus fermentum orci, nec malesuada libero vehicula ut. Integer sodales, urna eget interdum eleifend, nulla nibh laoreet nisl, quis dignissim mauris dolor eget mi. Donec at mauris enim. Duis nisi tellus, adipiscing a convallis quis, tristique vitae risus. Nullam molestie gravida lobortis. Proin ut nibh quis felis auctor ornare. Cras ultricies, nibh at mollis faucibus, justo eros porttitor mi, quis auctor lectus arcu sit amet nunc. Vivamus gravida vehicula arcu, vitae vulputate augue lacinia faucibus.

Ut porttitor euismod cursus. Mauris suscipit, turpis ut dapibus rhoncus, odio erat egestas orci, in sollicitudin enim erat id est. Sed auctor gravida arcu, nec fringilla orci aliquet ut. Nullam eu pretium purus. Maecenas fermentum posuere sem vel posuere. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Morbi ornare convallis lectus a faucibus. Praesent et urna turpis. Fusce tincidunt augue in velit tincidunt sed tempor felis porta. Nunc sodales, metus ut vestibulum ornare, est magna laoreet lectus, ut adipiscing massa odio sed turpis. In nec lorem porttitor urna consequat sagittis. Nullam eget elit ante. Pellentesque justo urna, semper nec faucibus sit amet, aliquam at mi. Maecenas eget diam nec mi dignissim pharetra.

Proin Sodales Quam Nec Sollicit

Quisque ligula ipsum, euismod aturesit vulputate a, ultricies et elit. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos himenaeos. Nulla nunc dui, tristique in semper vel, congue sed ligula. Nam dolor ligula, faucibus id sodales in, auctor fringilla libero. Pellentesque pellentesque tempor tellus eget hendrerit. Morbi id aliquam ligula. Aliquam id dui sem. Proin rhoncus consequat nisl, eu ornare mauris tincidunt vitae. Vestibulum sodales ante a purus volutpat euismod. Proin sodales quam nec ante sollicitudin lacinia. Ut egestas bibendum tempor. Morbi non nibh sit amet ligula blandit ullamcorper in nec risus. Pellentesque fringilla diam faucibus tortor bibendum vulputate. Etiam turpis urna, rhoncus et mattis ut, dapibus eu nunc. Nunc sed aliquet nisi. Nullam ut magna non lacus adipiscing volutpat. Aenean odio mauris, consectetur quis consequat quis, blandit a nunc. Sed orci erat, placerat ac interdum ut, suscipit eu augue. Nunc vitae mi tortor. Ut vel justo quis lectus elementum ullamcorper volutpat vel libero.

Donec volutpat nibh sit amet libero ornare non laoreet arcu luctus. Donec id arcu quis mauris euismod placerat sit amet ut metus. Sed imperdiet fringilla sem eget euismod. Pellentesque habitant morbi tristique senectus et netus et malesuada fames ac turpis egestas. Pellentesque adipiscing, neque ut pulvinar tincidunt, est sem euismod odio, eu ullamcorper turpis nisl sit amet velit. Nullam vitae nibh odio, non scelerisque nibh. Vestibulum ut est augue, in varius purus.

Proin dictum lobortis justo at pretium. Nunc malesuada ante sit amet purus ornare pulvinar. Donec suscipit dignissim ipsum at euismod. Curabitur malesuada lorem sed metus adipiscing in vehicula quam commodo. Sed porttitor elementum elementum. Proin eu ligula eget leo consectetur sodales et non mauris. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit.

Nunc tincidunt, elit non cursus euismod, lacus augue ornare metus, egestas imperdiet nulla nisl quis mauris. Suspendisse a pharetra urna. Morbi dui lectus, pharetra nec elementum eget, vulputate ut nisi. Aliquam accumsan, nulla sed feugiat vehicula, lacus justo semper libero, quis porttitor turpis odio sit amet ligula. Duis dapibus fermentum orci, nec malesuada libero vehicula ut. Integer sodales, urna eget interdum eleifend, nulla nibh laoreet nisl, quis dignissim mauris dolor eget mi. Donec at mauris enim. Duis nisi tellus, adipiscing a convallis quis, tristique vitae risus. Nullam molestie gravida lobortis. Proin ut nibh quis felis auctor ornare. Cras ultricies, nibh at mollis faucibus, justo eros porttitor mi, quis auctor lectus arcu sit amet nunc. Vivamus gravida vehicula arcu, vitae vulputate augue lacinia faucibus.

Ut porttitor euismod cursus. Mauris suscipit, turpis ut dapibus rhoncus, odio erat egestas orci, in sollicitudin enim erat id est. Sed auctor gravida arcu, nec fringilla orci aliquet ut. Nullam eu pretium purus. Maecenas fermentum posuere sem vel posuere. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Morbi ornare convallis lectus a faucibus. Praesent et urna turpis. Fusce tincidunt augue in velit tincidunt sed tempor felis porta. Nunc sodales, metus ut vestibulum ornare, est magna laoreet lectus, ut adipiscing massa odio sed turpis. In nec lorem porttitor urna consequat sagittis. Nullam eget elit ante. Pellentesque justo urna, semper nec faucibus sit amet, aliquam at mi. Maecenas eget diam nec mi dignissim pharetra.

Nunc Tincidunt Elit Cursus

Quisque ligula ipsum, euismod a vulputate a, ultricies et elit. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos himenaeos. Nulla nunc dui, tristique in semper vel, congue sed ligula. Nam dolor ligula, faucibus id sodales in, auctor fringilla libero. Pellentesque pellentesque tempor tellus eget hendrerit. Morbi id aliquam ligula. Aliquam id dui sem. Proin rhoncus consequat nisl, eu ornare mauris tincidunt vitae. Vestibulum sodales ante a purus volutpat euismod. Proin sodales quam nec ante sollicitudin lacinia. Ut egestas bibendum tempor. Morbi non nibh sit amet ligula blandit ullamcorper in nec risus. Pellentesque fringilla diam faucibus tortor bibendum vulputate. Etiam turpis urna, rhoncus et mattis ut, dapibus eu nunc. Nunc sed aliquet nisi. Nullam ut magna non lacus adipiscing volutpat. Aenean odio mauris, consectetur quis consequat quis, blandit a nunc. Sed orci erat, placerat ac interdum ut, suscipit eu augue. Nunc vitae mi tortor. Ut vel justo quis lectus elementum ullamcorper volutpat vel libero.

Donec volutpat nibh sit amet libero ornare non laoreet arcu luctus. Donec id arcu quis mauris euismod placerat sit amet ut metus. Sed imperdiet fringilla sem eget euismod. Pellentesque habitant morbi tristique senectus et netus et malesuada fames ac turpis egestas. Pellentesque adipiscing, neque ut pulvinar tincidunt, est sem euismod odio, eu ullamcorper turpis nisl sit amet velit. Nullam vitae nibh odio, non scelerisque nibh. Vestibulum ut est augue, in varius purus.

Proin dictum lobortis justo at pretium. Nunc malesuada ante sit amet purus ornare pulvinar. Donec suscipit dignissim ipsum at euismod. Curabitur malesuada lorem sed metus adipiscing in vehicula quam commodo. Sed porttitor elementum elementum. Proin eu ligula eget leo consectetur sodales et non mauris. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit.

Nunc tincidunt, elit non cursus euismod, lacus augue ornare metus, egestas imperdiet nulla nisl quis mauris. Suspendisse a pharetra urna. Morbi dui lectus, pharetra nec elementum eget, vulputate ut nisi. Aliquam accumsan, nulla sed feugiat vehicula, lacus justo semper libero, quis porttitor turpis odio sit amet ligula. Duis dapibus fermentum orci, nec malesuada libero vehicula ut. Integer sodales, urna eget interdum eleifend, nulla nibh laoreet nisl, quis dignissim mauris dolor eget mi. Donec at mauris enim. Duis nisi tellus, adipiscing a convallis quis, tristique vitae risus. Nullam molestie gravida lobortis. Proin ut nibh quis felis auctor ornare. Cras ultricies, nibh at mollis faucibus, justo eros porttitor mi, quis auctor lectus arcu sit amet nunc. Vivamus gravida vehicula arcu, vitae vulputate augue lacinia faucibus.

Ut porttitor euismod cursus. Mauris suscipit, turpis ut dapibus rhoncus, odio erat egestas orci, in sollicitudin enim erat id est. Sed auctor gravida arcu, nec fringilla orci aliquet ut. Nullam eu pretium purus. Maecenas fermentum posuere sem vel posuere. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit. Morbi ornare convallis lectus a faucibus. Praesent et urna turpis. Fusce tincidunt augue in velit tincidunt sed tempor felis porta. Nunc sodales, metus ut vestibulum ornare, est magna laoreet lectus, ut adipiscing massa odio sed turpis. In nec lorem porttitor urna consequat sagittis. Nullam eget elit ante. Pellentesque justo urna, semper nec faucibus sit amet, aliquam at mi. Maecenas eget diam nec mi dignissim pharetra.

Don't Think Too Much. Just Act.

"If you wait to do everything until you're sure it's right, you'll probably never do much of anything." - Win Borden "A ship is safe in a harbor, but that's not what ships are for." - William Shedd

I wanted to hit you early this morning with a few of my favorite and powerful quotes. 

I've been doing a LOT of public speaking lately. Conferences, keynotes, expos, organizations, and corporate gigs have been littering my calendar lately. It's been a BLAST. And I've learned a lot about the people I present to.

They're scared. Not the monster in the closet with the knife scared, but a slow, rhythmic, fear that invades their life. Their thinking.

And their actions.

The markets are unsure right now. Business is unsure right now. People are unsure right now.

But this is one of the best times to strike out and do something DIFFERENT. Take a chance. Try something new. BE BOLD IN LIFE.

I promise you — there are a LOT of people out there right now making a lot of money based on their ideas, their connections, and their HUSTLE.

You can be one of them too.

So today's charge for you is to look at what you do everyday and do it differently. Make a change. Reach out to someone who you thought was untouchable. Start something new. Improve and expand what you do.

It will not only motivate and inspire you — it will energize and get everyone around you to notice your tsunami.

Make it happen.

How To Better Control Your Time.

Time is the one thing you can never get back. So you need to be careful with it, don't waste it, don't hurry through it, and use it effectively. You need to CONTROL your time.

How do you do that? It's easy and it's hard — here are some tips:

Clear Your Desk.

I know . . . it's hard. But once it's done, it is so easy to focus without any distractions to instantly pull you away from the task at hand. Also there is the visual aspect of a clean desk. You FEEL better about yourself and your surroundings. It's easier to find things and important papers don't get lost.

So here's my strategy — Pile, View, Attack/File/Toss/LCB:

  1. Pile - Take everything off your desk and make a single pile of paper.
  2. View - Pick up and look at each piece of paper. You must make four piles:
  3. Attack - work on it immediately - something you can complete within a short amount of time.
  4. File - File it away for future access.
  5. Toss - Throw it away. I know it's hard - but most of your pile can go this route.
  6. LCB: Last Chance Bin - get a box and place it under your desk. If you are unsure of tossing something, put it into this bin. If you need it later, it's there. If not (after 3-6 months), toss it out. This bin works wonders.

Plan Your Day.

This is the hardest and surprisingly the easiest way to get a better handle on your time. Why?

If you go somewhere or if you're on a trip, you have a destination and a route to get there. That's called a plan.

Why is it when you get to work you don't architect the same thinking for your activities, meetings, and tasks? What needs to be done — what is it's priority — and when will you complete it?

Randy Pausch developed a very simple, yet effective template to help anyone plan their day. It's made up of four quadrants:

  • Due Soon and Not Due Soon
  • Important and Not Important

When you look at your "Attack" pile of work for the day, you usually work through it based on time in and time out. But importance flies out the window — most people aren't working on the most important and critical tasks. This tool helps them do it.

Which ones to work on first? Upper left! Which ones to work on last? Lower right! Here's a PDF template you can use.

Work On One Thing At A Time.

This is where we all fall down. We think we can 'multi-task' our work and guess what? We never get anything done or even worse, we do things in a haphazard fashion.

Take your Attack pile and your Activity List and make your way down each item. Once it's complete, check it off. Set aside time to work on your attack pile — don't answer the phone — don't let anyone bother you — don't let anything take your focus away from the task at hand until you are DONE. You can always return that phone call 15-30 minutes later or go see the person who wanted to see you.

Also — turn your email reminders OFF. You can get back to checking email when you're DONE.

At first it will be difficult. But when you start to see a clean desk, a planned out day, and REAL progress on your work. These basic behaviors will begin to kick in. Try it!

 

 

 

Your Communication Skills Stink – Part Two.

Last week, I covered why communication is so important to business. Speaking with your clients, team, peers and boss are all critical to your success and are usually the nexus of problems when things go awry. See Part One here. If you break down the structure of communication, it really is the transmission of information. You say something, I respond. I say something, you respond.

It's a 'Give & Take' relationship, but sometimes the signal lines can be bad. The wires are compromised. Emotions get in the way.

And this can happen in a millisecond. It's probably happened to you — you are speaking with someone and suddenly — they shut down, they get an angry look on their face, or they bite back with venom. It's all happened to all of us — we chose the wrong word, or focused on the wrong example — and BAM! We get hit right in the nose. And it hurts.

Especially when communicating information. When selling to a prospect, instructing a team member, or speaking with a superior, one needs to be SO careful — here is the architecture of the conversation.

On one end is IDU — I Don't Understand. On the other is YDU — You Don't Understand.

IDU is the state where the person begins to shut down because you are speaking about a subject they don't know or understand. You are talking OVER their head. When it happens, the person starts to feel inferior or incompetent and they shut down.

YDU is the state where the person begins to get angry because YOU don't know or understand their situation. You are talking PAST them. When it happens, the person starts to feel angry or contempt for you — they begin to interrupt or sit and stew with anger.

IDU is on one end of the spectrum and YDU is on the other end. Your job is to remain in the middle with your communication, giving them info while ensuring you don't venture in IDU or YDU territory.

And the way to ensure this doesn't happen is to:

  1. Watch for physical signals. They might start looking away or looking angry or impatient. They might not respond immediately or come back with a response that sounds frustrated or angry. On the phone, listen for typing or clicking — they are not listening, they are multi-tasking.
  2. Ask questions along the way. Like: "Are you with me so far?" or "Am I speaking too quickly?" or " Do you want me to review any aspect of what I just covered?" or "Do you know this already?" This gives the receiver a chance to better understand the information and will quickly take you out of the IDU/YDU area.
  3. Paraphrase their response. When they do respond, paraphrase what you just heard. This will quickly take you out of the YDU end of the spectrum.

Communication is so critical for your success — make sure it is TWO-WAY!

How The Boomers Screwed Up OR We Can All Do Better.

I've been struggling with this generational paradox for the past 5-10 years and have asked a ton of people what they think about it. This theory comes closest to what I feel happened, is happening, and probably will happen.

This One Phrase Will Transform Your Business.

This weekend, I was hiking with my family in a state park — lots of trees, streams, and ticks. We all had a great time and the summer heat wasn't too oppressive. While we were exiting the forest, we were speaking about the economy and business, and my brother Jeff mentioned a quote I've never heard:

"Shame on you for not charging enough to stay in business."

It hit me like a thunderbolt. How many businesses do we encounter that bemoan the fact they aren't making enough money to survive?

Here's a little financial equation I use to understand the financials of your business and career.

  1. How much money do you want to make this year? Let's say $125,000 to make the math easy.
  2. Divide it by 50 weeks (you get 2 weeks off for vacation) = $2500 each week.
  3. Divide it by 5 days a week = $500 each day.
  4. Divide it by 8 hours = $62.50 per hour. But you have to have 40 solid hours of billing. If not, you need to increase this figure — even double it.

That's your hourly rate you need to make to pull in $125K a year. It doesn't take into account overhead, materials, help, etc. But it gives you a generalized idea of how much you are WORTH.

Then I have my clients build their business model the other way:

  1. How much can you charge each client on an hourly basis? Let's say $100 an hour.
  2. How many billable hours a day do you have? Let's say 5 = $500 per day.
  3. How many billable days per week? Let's say 4 = $2000 per week.
  4. 50 weeks per year = $100,000. A $25K shortfall.

This is important — usually the salary and hourly rate don't add up. I usually have to tell them to charge their clients MORE MONEY. Or figure out a way to deliver additional services to their clients so they make more money. Can you upsell? Can you sell them more stuff?

In any case — you need to charge enough to stay in business.

What are you charging? Do you need to charge MORE?

Top 3 Mistakes Made In Family Businesses.

I run Multi-Generational Peer Review Groups — and boy do we have fun discussing many issues inherent with family businesses — especially ones where the younger sons/daughters work for the older parents. And the parents have one foot out the door into retirement, yet they feel they need to keep active and still make decisions. Or they are still working 60-70 hours a week and never delegate key responsibilities to their sons/daughters.

How To Solve ANY Problem.

Okay — the title might be a little misleading. If you just robbed a bank and are evading the authorities, this post will probably not work for you (Sorry). But for most business and career problems — this will do just fine.

Change Your Life With A Cookie.

"You don't become a failure until you're satisfied with being one." A fortune cookie — I found this in a darn fortune cookie!

How serendipitous life is — when you least expect it — the universe opens a door to enlightenment.

So what does this mean?

  1. You are not instantly a failure when you fail.
  2. No one can make you a failure.
  3. Only you can make yourself a failure.
  4. It's easy to fail, but then it's also as easy to decide to learn from your failure.
  5. Failure is a prolonged state of mind.
  6. Failure influences future behaviors.

Are you going to make mistakes? Sure.

Are you going to fail? Sure.

But we need to understand is HOW we react to that failure. If we let it defeat us — Failure has won.

If we step back and learn from our failure — we move on. We stay strong. We get that much closer to success.

So today — don't focus on your failures, your losses, your dropped balls, your missed chances.

Today I want you to see what CAN happen. What you can do right NOW.

You'll thank me.

New Job Success Or Failure: Your First Day.

Here are key quick tips I give to all of my clients prior to their first day on the job.