Control

Are You A Warrior?

"The basic difference between an ordinary man and a warrior is that a warrior takes everything as a challenge, while an ordinary man takes everything as a blessing or as a curse." — Carlos Castenada Whether you're a man or woman, business-owner or corporate executive, young or old, life is programmed to throw a lot of obstacles in your path.

Work is just a series of problems that require someone to solve them in an efficient, timely, and cost-effective manner. Many people tend to worry, obsess, and outright fear certain outcomes from their daily work life.

Candidly, you're not going into an arena at the Colosseum to fight another warrior to the death. You might be pitching a new prospect and there's the fear of losing that account. I've been there.

2016 (as proposals go) sucked for me so far. Two major clients who REACHED OUT TO ME for my workshop skills asked for a number of different proposals to have me run events for their associates. In both instances, they ran me through multiple hoops to hone my proposal, tighten my pricing, and deliver the perfect solution to grow their organization.

Guess what? At the last minute, they pull out (for a number of reasons) and either cancel or go with another provider. (By the way — this is pro-forma for most businesses).

Now did I complain? Did I whine? Did I get mad? Did I curse my existence?

NO. I took the warrior's path and looked at it like a challenge. I had to step up my game.

Not only did I revamp my entire selling presentation structure, I reviewed my proposal template (and changed it), and developed a series of beautifully designed brochures as leave-behinds (to further cement my reputation once I left the room).

In addition, I re-doubled my efforts with all of my prospects and hit them twice as hard with TLC and many new ideas for in-house workshops. I WILL GET BUSINESS FROM THEM.

I keep coming back to an old movie I saw many years ago — Door To Door with William H. Macy: "Patience and Persistence will win anyone over in the end."

I didn't whine. I didn't complain. By the way, do you want to know something interesting about complaining?

“The only thing complaining does is convince other people that you are not in control.”

The Warrior is in control. I promise you I will host many more workshops this year compared to past years.

And that's a promise. Be The Warrior.

 

 

How to Live Your Dream When You're Scared to Death.

Did something scare you today? This week? This year? What really scares you? An angry boss? A lost client? A problem without a solution? Zombies?

And more importantly, what does your fear make you do? Do you shut down? Make quick decisions without thinking?

When you're scared, you make emotional decisions. Sometimes they are rational and sometimes they are irrational. Sometimes these decisions turn into irrational actions.

For example, did you ever blow up over something that turned out to be quite inconsequential? I tend to 'lose it' on myself when I accidentally drop something when cooking in the kitchen. In retrospect, it was an accident, I didn't plan for it, and I mistakenly dropped a dish of food. But I still 'lost it' on myself. I wasn't scared, but I still acted irrationally.

It happens to the best of us. I help my clients look at their lives as a huge long line or spectrum with being 'totally in-control' at one end and 'totally out-of-control' at the other end. Most of the time, when we're scared, we tend to feel that we have moved from the safe, in-control extreme to the perilous out-of-control extreme.

But that's not true. We've just moved a little bit on our control line. Here's a little secret: We're never really totally in-control either. Someone or some thing, somewhere has a bit of control over us or has the ability to careen us out-of-control.  For example, our health, our kids, our spouse/partner, work, finances, etc. all can quickly have an immediate impact on our control system.

The faster you realize you are never in complete control AND that you are never in complete chaos, the faster you will move from being scared to a more meditative sense of reality. Realize that we spend our lives moving along this 'control' line without fear — we're just trying to get things done, we hit a road-block, and we solve that problem and move on.

Here are some rules I adhere to:

1. You are not at the far (deep) end of the out-of-control line. You've moved a bit out of control, don't be scared, and realize a small action can bring you back in control quickly. Don't stay in one place and begin to emotionalize your reaction. Worrying about what might happen will never really help you — you need to think rationally about your options and take action.

2. Take one small step. One micro-task which will allow you to start moving in the right direction and begin to feel better about your situation. Again, if you do nothing, you'll go nowhere. Even if you move backwards, at least you're moving — you can always course correct.

3. "Action expresses priorities." - Gandhi. Once you take action — any action — you will begin to stop worrying/being scared and start to make further decisions to help you get back into a control situation. Movement or action begins to eliminate most worry and fear. Get out of that haunted house ASAP!

Let me know how this works — the last thing I want you doing is spending a beautiful spring, scared, full of fear and stranded in worry. Life is SO much better than that.

How To Deal With Stress At Work.

Stress is a normal part of the workplace — what really counts is how you react and deal with it.

How To Better Control Your Time.

Time is the one thing you can never get back. So you need to be careful with it, don't waste it, don't hurry through it, and use it effectively. You need to CONTROL your time.

How do you do that? It's easy and it's hard — here are some tips:

Clear Your Desk.

I know . . . it's hard. But once it's done, it is so easy to focus without any distractions to instantly pull you away from the task at hand. Also there is the visual aspect of a clean desk. You FEEL better about yourself and your surroundings. It's easier to find things and important papers don't get lost.

So here's my strategy — Pile, View, Attack/File/Toss/LCB:

  1. Pile - Take everything off your desk and make a single pile of paper.
  2. View - Pick up and look at each piece of paper. You must make four piles:
  3. Attack - work on it immediately - something you can complete within a short amount of time.
  4. File - File it away for future access.
  5. Toss - Throw it away. I know it's hard - but most of your pile can go this route.
  6. LCB: Last Chance Bin - get a box and place it under your desk. If you are unsure of tossing something, put it into this bin. If you need it later, it's there. If not (after 3-6 months), toss it out. This bin works wonders.

Plan Your Day.

This is the hardest and surprisingly the easiest way to get a better handle on your time. Why?

If you go somewhere or if you're on a trip, you have a destination and a route to get there. That's called a plan.

Why is it when you get to work you don't architect the same thinking for your activities, meetings, and tasks? What needs to be done — what is it's priority — and when will you complete it?

Randy Pausch developed a very simple, yet effective template to help anyone plan their day. It's made up of four quadrants:

  • Due Soon and Not Due Soon
  • Important and Not Important

When you look at your "Attack" pile of work for the day, you usually work through it based on time in and time out. But importance flies out the window — most people aren't working on the most important and critical tasks. This tool helps them do it.

Which ones to work on first? Upper left! Which ones to work on last? Lower right! Here's a PDF template you can use.

Work On One Thing At A Time.

This is where we all fall down. We think we can 'multi-task' our work and guess what? We never get anything done or even worse, we do things in a haphazard fashion.

Take your Attack pile and your Activity List and make your way down each item. Once it's complete, check it off. Set aside time to work on your attack pile — don't answer the phone — don't let anyone bother you — don't let anything take your focus away from the task at hand until you are DONE. You can always return that phone call 15-30 minutes later or go see the person who wanted to see you.

Also — turn your email reminders OFF. You can get back to checking email when you're DONE.

At first it will be difficult. But when you start to see a clean desk, a planned out day, and REAL progress on your work. These basic behaviors will begin to kick in. Try it!

 

 

 

How To Solve ANY Problem.

Okay — the title might be a little misleading. If you just robbed a bank and are evading the authorities, this post will probably not work for you (Sorry). But for most business and career problems — this will do just fine.

How Not To Get Angry On The Job.

"I've had a few arguments with people, but I never carry a grudge. You know why? While you're carrying a grudge, they're out dancing." - Buddy Hackett We all get angry. It's normal.

The real question is WHY we get angry. As I tell my clients, to be happy, we need to have a certain amount of control in our lives. Not totally, but we have to have a handle on many situations to ensure that we don't go quietly insane.