How To Do The Hard Things In Life.

We all encounter 'bad' stuff that we have to do in our lives. Make the hard phone call, visit the recalcitrant client, tell your vendor bad news. We all have that terrible interaction we all hate to do. You might have to ask for a late payment, a raise/promotion, or tell a client that a project will be late. You might have to reach out to a prospective employer who might want to hire you.

So what do we do? We procrastinate — we put off — we do anything else except that one hard thing.

And it festers. It grows. And it takes on a life of it's own. Just like the 50's movie 'The Blob' with Steve McQueen, the longer we let it roll around, the faster it grows and starts killing people. Just kidding - but it was a scary movie when I was a kid.

Here's how I train my clients to do the hard things in life — we have to treat it like we're going to run a 10k race. What are the four things we need to do to prepare for a long race?

1. Practice — You can't just run a 10k — you have to practice and prepare incrementally to do your best. You need to practice what you're going to say and do. Develop a series of bullet talking-points to guide you. Refine them — less is more. Then practice them until they roll off your tongue. Run them by someone you trust until you have the right mix of intensity and empathy to get your point across and get the intended result.

2. Fuel — You have to eat the right foods to fuel your body. It's now time to feed the motivation part of your brain. Figure out the one thing you do to get yourself in the right state of mind with a heavy dose of mental momentum. Listen to your favorite workout song, read motivational quotes/books, call a friend who energizes you, or even workout. Do something that will instantly build your confidence and get you ready to make that connection.

3. Stretch — Right before a race, everyone stretches their muscles and joint to get them ready for the 10k. I want you to do the same thing — once you build up your confidence, I want you to center yourself and focus solely on the task at hand. Meditate, close your eyes and focus.

4. Explode — Get on the starting line, the gun goes off, and you explode forward with hundreds of other runners all vying for position. I also want you to explode — after practicing, fueling, and stretching — I want you to go right up to your phone, dial the number and make that call. Don't procrastinate and don't tell yourself you're not ready — you know you are. Just do it.

When you finally do it — everyone — and I mean everyone — says that it wasn't as hard as they thought. In fact, they say it's pretty easy. Now it's time to make that second call. And the third. And so on. Good Luck!

A Mastermind Group Is Critical To Your Success.

Let's get right into it — You need to join/start a mastermind group. Here are the facts: WHAT is a mastermind group?

Four to seven people in the trenches just like you, who work on their business/career, and who want to learn and grow. Each member offers their current resources, tactics 
and tools that work for them — 
plus they give you support when you need it.

WHY start a mastermind group?

It's a structure that will literally pull your business forward:

• You don't get sidelined when bad things happen.
• You don't get distracted, because you’re building a critical support system.
• You have a comfort zone of success you’re accustomed to and can measure your performance.
• As you break through each ceiling, you'll need partners to pull you up.

WHO should be in your mastermind group?

Optimally, you play better tennis with people who play better than you. But I feel that diversity is the real power of your mastermind — get members from many areas/industries, age groups, etc. Surprisingly, you will all have the same issues, with subtle filters personalizing them to your business/career.

WHEN should you meet?

Usually you meet on a strict, regular schedule — bi-weekly, monthly, or quarterly. Attendance should be mandatory — your mastermind will only work if everyone is invested in its success. They run 3-8 hours, depending on the number of members, frequency of meetings, and the general 'antsyness' of each attendee.

FACILITATOR - Yes or No?

Yes — if you find your mastermind strays off course frequently and resembles a coffee klatch. The minute it becomes disorganized, unruly or off-course, you need a facilitator. I can help.

No — if you have dedicated members who recognize the power of your group, stay focused, and share in the responsibility of facilitating, developing topics to discuss, etc.

WHAT is the PAYOFF of a mastermind group?

• Exclusive Community — it involves dedication, communication, and a true willingness to succeed.
• Not On Your Own — the feeling of being alone goes away. You get committed business/career advisors.
• Grow Your Network — you get to connect with people you never knew existed.
• Learn — bring your skills & experience to the group. Other members will have a solution for you.
• Refer — once you are true colleagues, it's easy to refer business to one another.
• Unbelievable — masterminds infinitely impact your morale, business and career.

THE BOTTOM LINE:

We think our business/career security comes from making a lot of money, having a big title, or a checklist of major clients, but we're wrong. The greatest source of our security comes from close relationships with trusted friends.

To learn more about masterminds and how they can affect your business/career — let's talk.

I Found Out I Have PMR*.

I came upon a great quote from the Dalai Lama —  "There are only two days in the year that nothing can be done. One is called yesterday and the other is called tomorrow, so today is the right day to love, believe, do, and mostly live."

How often do we feel disappointed/guilty about yesterday and anxious/fearful about tomorrow? Probably a lot.

How do we live in 'today' increments? How do we focus on what needs to happen right now without letting the past and future hold us back?

I use a simple acronym - P M R:

P = Plan — Take 5 minutes to Plan your day. Get real, assess exactly what needs to get accomplished, and write it down. Just the stuff that needs to be done today. Add time increments to estimate how long each will take, prioritize each one, and then plug them into your day calendar.

M = Meditate — Take 5 minutes to Meditate. Clean the cobwebs! Sit back, close your eyes, and clear your thoughts. Start by taking a few deep breaths then use the exhalation to sigh and release the tension. Do it again. And again. I promise you will feel better and energized.

R = Reflect — Take 5 minutes to Reflect on all the good things in your life. Gratitude is an important part of staying in the present. We tend to focus and think of all the bad things, worry, forget, and then start the whole process again. Try to focus on the positive this time — your accomplishments, your family, etc.

Take the rest of the time and get stuff done! Don't be afraid of diving in and accomplishing your action items — in fact, you will feel invigorated. Trust me!

*Just found out there is a disease with the same acronym (there always is) - I do not have it nor am I at all using the acronym lightly.

The 5 Behaviors Of Successful People.

When I start with clients who are in-transition, we meet at my office in Stamford and I cover the Five Behaviors Of Successful People. I do this to help them focus, get out of a mental 'rut', and move forward with enthusiasm, passion, and determination.

In retrospect, I actually cover these five areas with all of my clients, but I do it differently — I'm a bit more subtle:

TRACK & PLAN You need to know where you've been, where you are, and where you're going at ALL TIMES. This means tracking your time (schedule) minute by minute and accounting for all of your time and energy. You should be sticking to a plan, taking discrete steps each day, and taking it to its natural conclusion.

FAIL: If you're just winging your calendar or making large swaths of time blocks, you're not tracking effectively. If you don't have a plan (try setting up 90-day plans — they're manageable), you will fail.

BE BOLD One of the original taglines for my coaching practice was "Be Bold In Life". I still love it because it embodies the swashbuckler spirit that we all need to be successful in business. You need to take chances, uncover opportunities, and most of all, you need to be BOLD in your thinking.

FAIL: Just keep saying "I can't do that!". Or constantly ask for permission to do things instead of just doing them. Or not doing them because you know they're going to fail.

THINK & ACT This is the cornerstone of my coaching philosophy — figure out what needs to be done and DO IT. Don't second guess yourself and get caught up in analysis-paralysis. Look at your options, make a decision, and take action. Worst case, if your wrong, step back, reassess, and take action.

FAIL: Procrastinate, contemplate forever and try to come up with every permutation. Push for perfection.

CHALLENGE Life is a series of challenges you must overcome to keep moving and stay happy. Work, relationships, kids, etc. are all made up of small and large challenges that we must deal with. Here's the secret — embrace each challenge with enthusiasm and vigor or you will go through life with a glass half-empty existence.

FAIL: Moan, complain, and run away from your problems. The faster you come up with a plan and deal with your challenge, the faster you will get on with your life.

OPEN UP You can spend your life closed down and not interacting with anyone or you can open your heart to the world and make a lot of new friends. Try to make a new friend every day — an acquaintance, a connection — take an avid interest in your fellow man. Most of all — SMILE!!!

FAIL: Stay home, watch TV, cocoon, close your office door, keep your head down and let your voicemail/email take over all of your connections. Oh yes — forget to smile.

It's Not Too Late To Turn Things Around.

One of my clients had a grand opening this weekend — and I made it a point to be there to help out with the crowds. It's a state-of-the-art fitness complex — the first of it's kind in Oxford — and by the size of the reception, it's going to be a huge success. As a small present, I designed and printed a banner of Greg Plitt with one of his favorite quotes:

"There are two types of pain, the one that breaks you and the one that changes you. In the gym, pain is felt as a result of weakness leaving the body. Physical pain is the glue of transformation and the pain of progress. The more you endure the harder it gets to accept the thought of failure."

What a great quote. I read it every time I'm in his studio and he pushes me past my physical limits (ouch). What happens if we apply this quote to our business/career?

"There are two types of challenges, the ones that break you and the ones that change you."

How often are you really broken down? Of course, we lose our job, we lose major clients, get yelled at by our boss or we might make a terrible decision that cost us lots of money.

But are you really 'broken' — or just powered-down for the time being?

"In business, loss is felt as a result of weakness leaving the body."

Too often, we tend to hang onto loss — we dwell on it — we make it a scar that we feel everyday. It keeps us from taking additional chances and bold decisions. We get gun-shy — we are afraid of making the same mistake again.

Will you REALLY make the same mistake again? Or are you coming up with excuses not to try something new that will take you out of your comfort zone?

"Business/Career loss is the glue of transformation and the pain of progress."

The bedrock of any business/career is TRANSFORMATION. You can't stand still — you have to innovate constantly to stay ahead of the competition. If you don't — you're taken off the main endcap shelf and tossed in the bargain bin.

"The more you endure the harder it gets to accept the thought of failure."

As you know, I regularly listen to 'How I Built This' — an NPR podcast where they interview successful business owners and how they got there. What's the one consistent theme I hear in every interview? FAILURE - LOSS - TRYING AGAIN.

If you grow a thicker skin when exposed to failure — it's easier to take bolder chances. Try it — it's fun.

Building Up From The Ashes.

What would you do if your website burnt down? Not literally, but if some catastrophic purge happened and you lost your entire website — all the copy, images, blog posts, testimonials — everything? You'd have to start FRESH. From the beginning. It would be a lot of work — but you'd get it done. And guess what — it would be better. Fresher. Newer. And it would probably bring in more clients.

Sometimes our career or business tends to get clogged up like an old set of drain pipes. Early on, water flowed through them perfectly — but as time wore on, they got gummed up with tired old slogans, artwork, and promotions.

Why? Because we don't see outside of our bubble.

• "It's good enough."
• "It says what I want it to say — even though I wrote it years ago."
• "That old business card still works — don't change it."
• "Everyone loves my holiday cards — I send the same one every year."
• "I have the perfect sales close — it works every time!"

FACT: If you don't change — you might go out of business or lose your job.

We have to tear down to rebuild. To start anew on a firmer foundation — to reach new customers and clients. To boldly go where no one has gone before.

Spring/Summer is here and it's time to clean house:

• Maybe a new logo is in order. A new font, shape, graphic might add energy to catch people's eyes.
• New coloration for your branding/signage. The wrong color/shade can date your company so quickly.
• A more responsive and attractive website that says less and does more. People don't have time to read pages of copy. Less is more - get right to the point and tell them what they need to know.
• Develop a new filing system for your desk. Make yourself more efficient and clear the decks.
• Clean your systems. Clean/replace your laptop, phone, etc.
• A new wardrobe, hairstyle, glasses, body. Stand back and be critical — maybe that hairstyle from the 80's isn't working anymore (I don't have that issue).

Every company and executive needs to update their image. If you don't, first impressions might turn potential clients and opportunities in the opposite direction. Yikes!

Are You In Group 'A' or 'B'?

I run into so many people who complain how they can't find a job, or get a promotion, or find new, great clients (Group 'A'). I also run into people who find a job quickly, get that promotion, and regularly find great clients (Group 'B').

What is the difference between Groups 'A' & 'B'? 

• Group 'A' has developed the most perfectly formed excuse structure holding them back from success.
• Group 'B' fights their big fears every day, dismisses the weak ones, and gets shit done.

What do they do?

• Group 'A' blames their weaknesses, the market, their age, other people, and how customers demand so much more. They moan about their bad luck, how no one wants them, and how other forces are impacting their success.
• Group 'B' doesn't play that game. There is no time for blaming. They figure out what needs to be done and they do it. They realize it's going to be hard, they will be tested, and they will have to push themselves harder than ever before.

What happens in the end?

• Group 'A' plays the same broken record every day and suddenly find that half of 2017 has passed them by. They're still without a job, with no promotional opportunities (and their current position on the chopping block), and clients disappearing at an alarming rate.
• Group 'B' gets the interview and offer. They get the promotion and raise they asked about. They go after and get even bigger clients - bigger than they ever dreamed.

Which group are you currently in? What group do you want to be in?

Extra Credit . . . How To Be In Group 'B':

• Stop looking and finding excuses for your situation. You're a smart boy/girl — you know exactly what the problem is. Get out there and take action.
• Be Bold In Life - Start taking chances — not wild-ass ones, think about your next steps and then move!
• Ask for forgiveness, not permission — this is my mantra — reach out to that unreachable person, ask for that raise, go after that affluent client.
• Do It NOW - Don't wait for 'the right time'. There's no time like the present. "Action expresses priorities." - Gandhi
• Stop procrastinating because you're 'afraid'. This is a No Whining Zone — no one is going to change your diaper.

They're Taking You For A Ride.

Today I'm going to rant. Sorry. I started my practice 10 years ago. And every day, I receive multiple "Get Rich Quick" schemes in my inbox.

"Just do this (spend money) and gold coins will fall from the sky." A large part of the digital marketing universe is leading on growing businesses with crazy incremental upsells that make me want to scream when I look at them.

And unfortunately, it's catching too many businesspeople in its cross-hairs.

They're quickly getting burned out, constantly feeling confused, doubting themselves, and secretly wondering if maybe they don't have what it takes to live their dream of a successful business.

The Truth: You have the power. You have the knowledge. You have the ability. 

Here are the three things you need to know how to run a successful business:

1. Work Hard — I'm not saying that you have to kill yourself. But you do have to work harder than you ever did in a corporate job. This is YOUR company — you have to put in the hours and focus to get things done. No goofing around — no surfing, no taking the day off, no long lunches with friends — you should be focusing on your prospects, clients, and product.

2. Be Consistent — Too many people try something and then they get distracted. It doesn't work at first and then they give up. I've been writing articles for 8 years and have 750+ articles to my name. I've been attending a professional business group for over 10 years and I almost never miss a meeting (even though I have an hour's commute and it starts at 7 AM). If you have a good idea or innovative strategy, keep at it — people will notice.

3. Stay away from the "Get Rich Quick" people — if they are so foolproof and powerful, why are those people using them to become multi-millionaires? I love the photo, law, or insurance 'experts' who can help you make seven figures in your first year. If they're so good at what they do — why aren't they still practicing what they preach and raking in the big bucks? Because they failed at photography, law, or insurance and now hawk antiquated systems to novice professionals.

Don't fall for it.

5 Easy Steps To Improve Your Life.

There are so many books, seminars, and articles about how to motivate (yes I know, this is one too!). But I think they miss something big: To be successful in business and life, you need to build a motivational foundation inside YOU.

1. FOCUS & MEDITATE 

Do you spend hours doing nothing? Do you play online games? Too much Youtube/News Sites? You are not alone — and the first thing to stop these destructive behaviors is finding a purpose, a goal to focus your energies. How do I do this? I listen to John & Julianne.

I have done a lot of meditation throughout my life and John and Julianne from Profound Life Wellness are the BEST. Relax, take deep breaths and allow your mind to float. Think of things that make you happy, think of things that get you excited about life. They will come to you in relaxation.

If you’ve never tried meditation — today’s the day.

2. MOVE YOUR BODY

A good solid 20-minute walk will do more for a depressed person than any medication. Exercise makes you feel better, look better and perform better in life. It chases away all those negative thoughts that creep in during the day.

If you’re really committed and live in the Oxford CT area, my personal trainer (THE BEST) just opened a new studio — check it out here.

3. MEET LOTS OF PEOPLE

So now you have desire and purpose, you feel good, you look good, but you don't feel that happiness I've been talking about.

YOU NEED TO START TALKING TO EVERYONE. There is an art to a good conversation and coupled with that a skill to overcoming shyness. When you were first learning how to add, it was hard. Looking back, it seems 21+18 is a joke equation compared to f(x) is (-ia)ⁿg(a).

The art of conversation is the same. We learn the basics of conversation, but not the skills needed to carry a great one as an adult. I want you to think of someone you love talking to — what is it about the conversation that makes it fun, lively, and memorable?

Here’s a great book to help you.

Learn this skill — it will land you a great job, build your business, and attract the best friends you'll ever have.

4. MAKE PEOPLE WANT TO TALK TO YOU

Who wants to be a hit at parties? YOU DO! Memorize these psychological quizzes (everyone loves them and they’re easy to learn):

• Super Power - Flying or X-Ray vision (their real personality)
• Favorite Animal (how they view themselves)
• Second Favorite Animal (their ideal partner)
• Describe a Tree on top of a hill (their view on life)
• Room with no doors, windows, black except for candle how do you feel? (Their thoughts and feelings on death)

Try this to any group of people and they will love it. Learn the art of making every conversation exciting and fun for both you and your 'verbal judo' sparring partner.

5. BE GRATEFUL

Now things are going well — and they will keep going well as long as you don't take what you have, what you’ve learned and what you gained FOR GRANTED.

To keep that joy, motivation, and happiness flowing you need GRATITUDE. Here’s a great tool to do this every day.

The Five Minute Journal will help train your mind to appreciate what you have and to be happier with it.

MAKE IT HAPPEN

I hope you enjoyed these tips — now go dance your happy dance because dancing is incredibly awesome. I do it every day.

Whoops! I've Been Doing It All Wrong.

"Your mind is not a warehouse, it's a factory." So many people (me included), tend to use their mind as a warehouse. We keep arcane facts, appointments, commitments, to-do's, worries, plans, and passions all whirling around in our heads.

We think we are more productive when we have the ability to instantly 'touch' each of these items if we need to. Unfortunately, all of these items tend to get in the way when you want to do serious work or thinking.

We tend to focus on the urgent and put the important on the back burner. And when the mental whirlwind causes you to forget something or procrastinate on an important task, your mental Jenga stack of blocks fall apart.

Stop being a warehouse — try to delegate/outsource all of these items to paper, planners, and assistants so they can help you focus on the important and not only the urgent.

Start being a factory — where great ideas and plans come in, are addressed and executed, and are shipped out to your clients.

P.S. If you want to be more productive, efficient and effective, Let’s talk. I’ve worked with people from all over the world who want to expand their horizons — call me to schedule a free session.

Never Listen To The 'Experts'.

Just listened to one of my favorite podcasts this morning — How I Built This. They hosted Manoj Bhargava, the man who invented the 5-Hour Energy Drink. Manoj is a self-made man who started his career driving a $300 dump truck hauling away construction garbage. Now he's a billionaire dedicated to donate 99% of his estate to help the world. There were a number of powerful statements that caught my ear. Here are a few:

"You have to be totally determined - I hate the word passionate. If you get hit, passion tends to fade. Determination - if you get hit 20 times, you get up again." Everyone has a passion. Many people leave their jobs and start their own business based on that passion. Some do well, most don't. Manoj is spot on — passion will only take you so far, determination will pick you up when you fall down. TAKEAWAY: Drive, determination, and tenacity will help you build you a successful business.

"It's not rocket science. If you use common sense, you're in great shape. If you use experts, you're in so much trouble." I find this quote so fitting to my profession, being a Business Performance Coach. So many times I'm asked by prospective clients, "Do you have a lot of experience in my industry?" I usually say, "No, I don't. But it doesn't matter." Most businesspeople want 'experts' who know their industry and can give them the 'secrets of their success'. Unfortunately, most of the time, these experts are people who tried their hand in that industry and failed, that's why they're not doing it anymore. As a coach who uses 'common sense', I am looking at your situation from the outside in, a completely different perspective from where you are. I keep it simple and focus on the basics — that's usually where the problems hide. TAKEAWAY: "Experts are great for telling you what not to do. But what you should do? They haven't a clue."

"You've got to figure that out. How hard can it be? I'll figure it out." I love Manoj's simple way of attacking a complex problem. He makes the complex, simple — the gargantuan, a series of small steps. Sit down, get a piece of paper and map out the steps you have to do and the people you have to see. It's that simple. TAKEAWAY: Dive right in and attack. Don't over-think it.

"If these guys can come up with this, I can do better." Just because someone has done something, it doesn't make them geniuses — they just did it first. I love his philosophy and drive — I can do it too. TAKEAWAY: You can do it better if you just try.

"Most people who have invented great things didn't have a background in that area." They didn't follow the 'rules' of the experts. Again, they are thinking from outside of the bubble and not beholden to a series of arcane rules — in fact, they're the rule-breakers. TAKEAWAY: Be a rule-breaker.

P.S. If you want work with a coach who uses common sense and sticks to the basics,  Let’s talk. I’ve work with people from all over the world who want to play a bigger game — call me to schedule a free session.

Play With The Big Boys & Girls.

We've got a big snowstorm here in Oxford, Connecticut. Thankfully, I work from my home office on Fridays — so I really don't have to go anywhere — I just meander down to my first-floor home office and talk to my clients. We only get better when we play tennis with better tennis players. One way is to immerse ourselves into their lives, their learnings, and their tricks of the trade.

I thought I would do a "Rich's Favorite Things Early 2017" post and let you know what resources I use to stay at the top of my game. So here goes . . .

Podcasts:

How I Built This - I religiously listen to ever episode. It's about innovators, entrepreneurs, and idealists, and the stories behind the movements they built. Each episode is a narrative journey marked by triumphs, failures, serendipity and insight — told by the founders of some of the world's best known companies and brands. (from NPR)

The Tim Ferriss Show - I've listened to this since his first broadcast. Tim Ferriss deconstructs world-class performers from eclectic areas (investing, chess, pro sports, etc.), digging deep to find the tools, tactics, and tricks that listeners can use.

Smart Passive Income Online Business and Blogging - Pat Flynn reveals all of his online business and blogging strategies, income sources and killer marketing tips and tricks so you can be ahead of the curve with your online business or blog. Discover how you can create multiple passive income streams that work for you so that you can have the time and freedom to do what you love, whether it's traveling the world, or just living comfortably at home.

Books:

The One Thing - You'll learn to cut through the clutter, achieve better results in less time, build momentum toward your goal,  dial down the stress, overcome that overwhelmed feeling, revive your energy, stay on track, and master what matters to you. The ONE Thing delivers extraordinary results in every area of your life--work, personal, family, and spiritual.

The Pumpkin Plan - Each year Americans start one million new businesses, nearly 80 percent of which fail within the first five years. Under such pressure to stay alive—let alone grow—it’s easy for entrepreneurs to get caught up in a never-ending cycle of “sell it—do it, sell it—do it” that leaves them exhausted, frustrated, and unable to get ahead no matter how hard they try.  The Pumpkin Plan guides you through unconven­tional strategies to help you build a truly profitable blue-ribbon company that is the best in its field.

P.S. If you want to play with the big boys and girls,  Let’s talk. I’ve worked with people from all over the world who wanted to play a bigger game and I got them to Wimbledon — call me to schedule a complimentary session.

I Need To Have A Serious Conversation With You . . .

It's Friday — time to talk about the big things in life. I've been coaching for 15+ years and I frequently recognize certain situations and problems clients run into time and time again. I thought I would document some today . . .

1. Stay in the present.

If you live in the future, you will get anxious — if you live in the past, you will get depressed. Generally, you have eight sleep hours, eight work hours, and eight personal hours — focus on what's in front of you. It's the only thing that you have the power to change or to shape or to use. It's your canvas. It's your material. So use it well.

2. Your happiness is not something to pursue — it is a by-product of doing the right thing. 

So many people try to 'attain' happiness — and then get frustrated when it slips through their fingers. Try to focus on whatever the right thing is - and happiness will follow. Angry at yourself that you got nothing done during the day? Maybe it's because you slept in late, you spent your workday surfing fun sites, and had an overly-long lunch.

On the surface, each of these behaviors should make you 'happy' — but I've found that when I'm feeling most depressed, its usually based on actions I either did or (more importantly) did not do. Don't hunt for happiness — it will come when you do the right things.

3. You've been sold a fake idea of what success really is.

You're being played — everyday, everywhere. On TV, the street, when talking with friends or family - it seems like everyone confuses the concept of rewards with success itself.

When it comes to money, fame, recognition, praise, the rewards usually belong to someone else. That's wrong. Think of success as sustained effort of will. It begins and ends with YOU, and no one else. NO  ONE  ELSE.

Think of any goal you may have — say, you've always wanted to be a highly successful businessperson. Close your eyes and imagine it. What does that look like?

I guarantee you're thinking about big offices with lots of people buzzing around, jetting off to far-away lands for lunch meetings,  and being interviewed by Fast Company, Forbes, or the Wall Street Journal.

In reality —  you're fantasizing about BEING a great businessperson and not actually doing the work to become a great businessperson. This thinking is deceiving because it places the emphasis on passive recognition over active, sustained effort.

If you shift your focus onto your own actions and the more you create a sustained effort, the more likely rewards will follow.

It's that simple.

P.S. Are you caught in one of these three traps? Let’s talk. I’ve worked with people from all over the world who wanted to take aggressive steps in their career — call me to schedule a complimentary session.

The Quote That Will Change Your Life.

The great Jim Rohn once said: "Success is a few simple disciplines, practiced every day — while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day."

Now step back and look at what you do every day. What actions or people move you forward? What actions or people keep you back?

Stop being a baby — you absolutely know your bad behaviors. Surfing on your laptop, overly long and gossipy conversations with ineffectual people, doing the same busywork that you know won't get you business. And the worst — hanging around people who are also fumbling their careers.

Conversely — you absolutely know every good action and person who can move you forward. At light speed.

You're just too afraid to reach out and ask them. Or just take the action that scares you silly.

When I coach my clients, we have these conversations frequently — ME: "Why don't you just call them?" THEM: "I can't do that! I wouldn't know what to say!" ME: "Yes you would - just make the call." THEM: "They don't want to hear from me!"

And so it goes — and I ultimately break down all of their excuses until they make the call. And guess what — they get the business. Or they meet someone they would only dream of meeting. It happens every day.

Today — I want you to start improving your positive disciplines — pick a few and DO them. You'll be surprised how fast your luck changes.

Stand Out From The Crowd With The Right Communication Skills.

I've invited Erin Ardleigh, President of Dynama Insurance and one of the best professionals I know, to give you a few tips on successful communication in business: I say “insurance salesperson”… You think, let me guess, “pushy”, “slick”, “fast talker”. Maybe you think of the stereotypical, unrelenting salesperson, such as Ned Ryerson, the schoolmate turned insurance salesman intent on selling life insurance to poor Phil, Bill Murray’s character in the film, Groundhog Day.

Well, I have to admit, I’m an insurance salesperson. As the founder and president of an insurance brokerage, I have to contend with the negative stereotypes that many people have about my industry. In my uphill battle to distinguish myself and earn my clients’ trust, I’ve found that communicating clearly and effectively is crucial to my success. I’ve worked with Jayne Latz of Corporate Speech Solutions to improve my elevator pitch, public speaking, and overall communication skills. Here are the tools that have helped me the most:

1. Listen, REALLY Listen. This sounds simple and obvious, but so few people truly do it. I try to start a meeting by asking a few questions, listening to the other person and learning what is important to them.  I love to hear my clients’ life stories – how they built their businesses and what their kids are up to – and they love to talk about their passions. Listening helps build a relationship, and lets people know I’m not there just to push a product at them.

2. Speak Clearly And Slowly. In my industry, there are a lot of product names, technical terms and acronyms. It’s easy to confuse a client with all of the ‘lingo’. My team never uses acronyms, even if we think the abbreviation is obvious, because we want to be certain that our client understands us. For example, long term care insurance is never just “LTC”. We speak slowly when using technical terms and give our clients time to write notes, if they like.

I’ve traveled extensively, and it’s made me realize just how quickly New Yorkers speak! When I’m talking with someone that speaks English as a second language, I am mindful of the speed of my speech and the enunciation of my words. I’ve adopted the same approach with clients, since insurance really does seem like a foreign language to many people!

When addressing a room, Jayne taught me to always take a slow, deep breath first, to smile, and to pause and count to three after saying my name and before saying my company name. I want my audience to hear my name and company name clearly so they can follow up with me!

3. Be Aware Of Your Body Language. If you’re focusing only on your speech, you’re missing a big part of effective communication. Most of us have distracting habits that we are not aware of: some people put their hands in their pockets, or nervously click a pen, others sway while standing and speaking. Having Jayne film me while I gave my elevator speech was an eye opener. I have the habit of using my hands a lot while I am speaking. Jayne helped me to use gestures to accentuate my message rather than distract from it. I make sure that my message is consistent, through both verbal and non verbal communication.

In business, we all need to communicate effectively, which takes training and practice. I think every business owner would benefit from communications coaching. (Having an amazing executive coach like Rich Gee doesn’t hurt either!) I, for one, am committed to continually improving my verbal and non verbal communication skills.

Now, if only I could bump into Bill Murray!

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Erin Ardleigh is the President of Dynama Insurance, an independent insurance brokerage that emphasizes transparency and education as part of the insurance planning process.  Dynama Insurance offers life, health, disability and long term care insurance as well as complimentary reviews of existing policies.  www.dynamainsurance.com

Jayne Latz of Corporate Speech Solutions is an expert in communication skills. For over 25 years she has worked as a speech-language pathologist, professional speech trainer and coach and has co-authored two books titled, Talking Business: A Guide to Professional Communication and Talking Business: When English is Your Second Language.  www.corporatespeechsolutions.com

You're Going To HATE What I Have To Say.

"I'm Going To Change Your Life In One Easy Step!" I get emails like this all the time. Personalities who say they will radically change your life instantly. All you have to do is believe (and spend $195, $795, 0r $8995) and you will get the secret to the riches of the universe without lifting a finger.

I just received another one today:  "Rewire your mindset to become unbeatable!" "Grow your financial fortune!" "Get ultra-fit and feel better than ever before!" "Achieve all the goals you never could achieve before!"

It's magic! And if you send them your money, they will change your life! Of course, they are highly successful, jetting around the world, filming videos in really cool places. So they must know the secret!

I get together with a number of high-level coaches each month and we are a bit perplexed with the success of these people who sell 21st century snake oil. Don't people get it? Here are some immutable rules of life:

1. Change doesn't happen overnight. It took you a long time to get where you are and it will take a little bit of determined work to get you where you want to be. Yes, you can 'change your mindset' — but the journey will be long, hard, and you will have to gird yourself against falling back into old routines.
2. You won't make seven figures right out of the gate. Unless you have a foolproof hair-growth formula (I'll buy it), incremental gains will only occur if you make the right decisions, at the right time, and deliver a powerful product/service that a lot of people see and want to buy.
3. You won't look like Ryan Gosling instantly. I don't know what 'ultra-fit' means, but after speaking with my personal trainer, it takes months/years to get (and stay) 'ultra-fit'.

Here's my 'secret' prescription for change:

• You need a roadmap. If you don't know where you are and where you want to go, you're going to fail. You also need a step-by-step plan of tasks and activities to get you there.
• You will need to focus. Don't get distracted by shiny objects — it will be hard to stay on track and not veer off into uncharted territory where you might get demotivated.
• You are going to test your limits of confidence and work. It's going to be hard at times — you will have to push yourself more than you ever have before.
• You are going to have to be open to change a few key things in your life. Bad habits and decisions are hard to break — you have to chart a new course and stay on it.
• You are going to make many mistakes along the way. It's a fact of business — take chances and you might fail. It's how you stand up and keep going.
• You are going to have to make a LOT of new friends. You have to reach out farther than you ever have before — meet people who are scary — make hundreds of new friends.
• You need a little luck. Yes, luck. Luck appears when you open yourself up to new opportunities, options, and friends. And you cast away bad habits and procrastination.

Think of the new successful tier of business - Tim Cook (Apple), Brin & Page (Google), Jeff Bezos (Amazon), Mark Zuckerberg (Facebook), Jack Ma (Alibaba), etc. They all have and currently work quite hard at their roles to get and stay where they are today. Want to be highly successful? Want to be a star? You have to work it.

"There's no such thing as a free lunch."

Is Your Business Under The Weather?

Most businesses today have a fatal flaw that will take down their entire client base. It’s the fear of doing something . . . anything . . . NEW. They know it ‘might’ fail — so they do nothing.

I’m here to tell you that doing nothing (most of the time) is worse than failing. Why?

Let me give you an example:

Let’s say you’re quite sick. Now many people will disregard the symptoms, say they are not sick — because they feel that the diagnosis or the treatment will be worse or possibly hurt them more than the illness. So they do nothing. What they don’t understand is that the initial reason why they are sick is not being addressed — and it will slowly grow to infect other parts of their body.

Now if they just tried one type of treatment or just went to the doctor and asked for a complete work-up, they would at least make a positive move forward in treating their sickness. Let’s say it failed – they should try something else. And something else — ad infinitum — until they felt better.

I did this with a recurring allergy. I first went to my general practitioner who gave me LOTS of pills. Nothing happened. So I went to a specialist. They took tests (63 pokes of a needle) and also gave me LOTS of pills. I got a little better, but then it came back. I then finally tried an old, but simple cure (a Neti Pot). Guess what? It worked. And I feel GREAT.

It’s like business. People will just act like nothing is wrong and “stay the course” while they see their clients and profits drain away. The problem is that they are afraid of taking any action — it might be wrong — it might worsen the situation — they might lose the business.

But at the end of the day, they need to understand that what is making their business sick can be cured. Here’s the simple process:

1. Realize that you’re sick. You might get better, but you’re probably going to get sicker. And sicker. And then die.
2. Understand why you’re sick. Get a good diagnosis. Find out what the causal elements are — Get the facts. Work with a partner or coach.
3. Take action. Make a list of possible treatments — list them by how much effort (time, money, resources) they will take and what impact they will make.
4. Pick one and take action . . . NOW. Accountability is key.

It’s that simple. As Nike says: “Just Do It.”

How Agile Are You?

"50% of occupations in corporations today will no longer exist by 2025." — from Fast Forward 2030: The Future of Work and the Workplace In less than 10 years, we're going to see a massive landscape change in companies, organizational structures, and even customer wants and needs. To succeed you need to be flexible, innovate, and be agile.

For example, 10 years ago, Steve Jobs walked out on stage and introduced the iPhone. At that moment, we couldn't even comprehend how smartphones took over our lives. We now have instantaneous access to a multitude of abilities only dreamed of a few years ago. Thousands of companies have sprung up that deliver physical and virtual products for our smartphones — and they're making billions (Instagram, Snapchat, etc.).

And guess what — it's only going to move faster and faster. So we need to come up with another way of anticipating change, observing the landscape, orient where we fit in, make a quick decision, and take action. We don't have time for five-year plans anymore — we need to cull them down to one-year plans and quarterly updates.

I have a solution for you. It's called the OODA Loop. Developed by military strategist and United States Air Force Colonel John Boyd, the OODA Loop was applied to the combat operations process, often at the strategic level in military operations.

The phrase OODA loop refers to the decision cycle of observe, orient, decide, and act — the approach favors agility over raw power in dealing with human opponents in any endeavor.

In fact, decisions occurs in a recurring agile cycle of observe-orient-decide-act (OODA):

• Observe - What's happening? What's changing? Who's growing? Who's shrinking? OPEN YOUR EYES.
• Orient - Where are you? What is your position in the marketplace? Where do you need to go? Who do you need to engage? SET A FIRM FOUNDATION, SEE WHERE YOU ARE AND WHERE YOU NEED TO GO.
• Decide - Once all facts are in - make a quick decision. Don't prevaricate or procrastinate. DECIDE & STICK TO IT.
• Act - Take action - do what you need to do, see who you need to see, meet who you need to meet, spend what you have to spend. MOVE FORWARD.

If an individual or an organization can process this cycle quickly, observing and reacting to unfolding events more rapidly than the competition — they can "get inside" the competition's longer decision cycle and gain the advantage.

In the next 5-10 years, new jobs will require increased creative abilities, social and emotional intelligence and the ability to leverage AI. Those jobs will be immensely more fulfilling than today’s jobs which are mostly centered on recurring activities with tedious paperwork and red tape.

So if you want to succeed in business — try the OODA method. It works.