Lately, a lot of people feel 'stuck' in their life. Why?
- Because of their past decisions leading up to the present.
- Because of the possibility of jumping into another terrible position.
- Because of the economy.
This is what I call "Not Living In The Present". Why? Let's look at the three reasons again:
- PAST GUILT: Past decisions leading up to the present.
- FUTURE FEAR: Possibility of jumping into another terrible position.
- DISPLACED ANGER: The economy.
Past Guilt
Blaming actions in the past that you feel are affecting the present. You are currently not feeling 'adequate' to attempt to jump to a new job because of your past failings, lack of knowledge/experience, or some other situation that might have happened to you.
Solution: You can't do anything about it. Stop frustrating yourself because of things that have happened in the past and start dealing with the qualities, experience, and talents that you currently have. Make a list - you will surprise yourself.
Future Fear
Being scared of the future may be real to you, but in reality, a waste of your time and energy. Why? You are predicting the future . . . if you knew exactly what was going to happen, go buy a lottery ticket. We hold ourselves back because we are insecure of what 'might' happen and we begin to concoct elaborate stories in our head to make them real.
Solution: Deal with your anxiety about the future — start making a plan based on reality and move from fear back into a strong secure place in your head and life. Sit down and map out specific goals you want to accomplish and those activities and tasks that will get you there. Add a timetable and you are done!
Displaced Anger
Blaming other people or forces about your misery is a common practice with many of my clients. Because of the marketplace, the economy, your clients, or a crazy boss, you are eliminating all ability to take control of the situation. There are always other options to any situation, unfortunately, we tend to throw them out the window and begin to blame things we cannot control.
Solution: Uncover, understand, and focus on the things you CAN control. Start breaking down your frustrations with outside forces and other people and begin to see opportunities that were hidden from you. The best way to do this is to state your situation, come up with alternatives, and brainstorm options, no matter how crazy or outlandish they are. You'll find that some of these options quickly turn into opportunities.
Start living in the present. You will be much happier and have abundant energy to change where you are NOW.
