No time to read? Listen here:
Many times in our lives, we all subtly undermine our success — when we unconsciously make bad choices, and our harmful behavior can impact nearly every part of our life.
This self-sabotage can stop us from achieving significant plans and goals in our careers and life.
Why Do We Self-Sabotage? (check the ones you use)
Fear - we’re afraid of the exposure or consequences. It’s usually not as bad as we think once we go out and do it.
Rejection - we think we will be ostracized or told a stern ‘NO.’ You will never know unless you try; most times, it never happens.
Trauma - past experiences come back to haunt us - every day. We usually make the trauma bigger than it was. Many career traumas can be overcome - they won’t happen twice.
Procrastination - is everyone’s favorite pastime. We put things off because we’re lazy, afraid to do it, or don’t have the time. We all do it - you’re going to have to complete it sometime.
Faulty thinking - many of these states fall into this area. Cognitive Dissonance plays a significant role in most people’s thinking.
Control - ‘I can’t control them, the project, etc. Yes, you can - you’ve let your emotions take over your logic. Some things are out of your control, stop trying to control them - go around them.
Anxiety - we’re nervous about the experience or outcome. This builds over time if you let it - when you encounter it, just do it.
Insecurities - guess what - we all have insecurities. Some people let them get the best of them, and others eliminate them.
Blaming - one of the big ones - we love to blame others and our circumstances. Stop blaming and start doing.
Imposter syndrome - another big one - we all suffer from IS (except for narcissists). The secret? We’re all faking it.
Low/No Self-Esteem - it’s hard to build up from here, but it’s not impossible. Take small, incremental steps to build your confidence.
How to Stop Self-Sabotaging Yourself: (try one)
Make Small Changes - do one thing today that will take you out of your comfort zone. You’ll find that it’s not that hard. Tomorrow, do it again.
Pinpoint Stressors - where are the real stressors? People, situations? Try to understand better the reason to minimize the stress.
Engage in Positive Self-Talk - one of my favorites. We negative-talk ourselves all day long - today, target and say a few positive points.
Know & Embrace Your Strengths - we know what we’re good at. Exercise those muscles and show people what you have to offer.
Make Failure Comfortable - failure is a part of life and work. If you don’t fail, you’re not learning or growing. Fail often!
Stop Procrastinating - Just do it - one of the most manageable symptoms to conquer. Block out time and force yourself to complete it.
Stop Perfectionism - nothing is perfect; it’s another reason to procrastinate the completion of projects/activities. Done is so much better than perfect.
Boost Your Self-Awareness - we walk around in a fog. Develop your 360° vision and be more observant of what’s happening around you.
Choose one of the solutions and try it today. Tomorrow, try another one. Next thing you know, your self-sabotage is a thing of the past.