And the parents have one foot out the door into retirement, yet they feel they need to keep active and still make decisions. Or they are still working 60-70 hours a week and never delegate key responsibilities to their sons/daughters (I’m going to use the term ‘kids’ for brevity). Here are some mistakes (and possible solutions) I see frequently:

1. Bad Communication.

Number one mistake made in multi-gen businesses. The parent is un-moveable, disruptive, or sticking to their guns and the kids give up on any sort of constructive communication.

Solution: “You’re not going to teach an old dog new tricks.” It’s the kids job to stay patient (and professional) and encourage healthy communication first. Try to bridge the gap and work with your parent and if needed, wear your heart on your sleeve when speaking with them. It’s also the job of the parent to also open their heart and mind to their kids’ overtures.

2. Loss of Self-Esteem.

If the kids are constantly reprimanded or berated when they do something wrong by the parent,  not only do they shut down and get resentful, they begin to lose faith in their abilities.

Solution: The parent needs to understand that there is a difference between motivational instruction and berating mistakes. They need to acknowledge that you will make mistakes along the way and they are their not only to catch you, but to encourage you to succeed. The kids need to understand that what took their parents 30-40 years to perfect cannot be learned in 2-3 years. In addition, your parents might not be the best teachers, so you sometimes need to pull information, techniques, and practices out of them for you to grow. It will take time.

3. Allocation of Responsibilities.

As the parent slowly relinquishes certain responsibilities to their kids (hopefully!), how the kids perform their new duties might be different than what the parent expects. So the parent begins to hold back the allocation and then adverse situations result. This especially happens when the kids try a new direction for an old problem (i.e., growing their web presence and killing all phone book advertising) and the parent doesn’t understand.

Solution: The parent needs to understand that the kids SHOULD be encouraged to do things differently or at least understand WHY their kids are taking a different tack to solve a problem. The kids need to move slowly and continuously bring their parents up to speed on the whys, whats, and hows of their strategy. You just cannot say ‘trust me’ – it will only inflame the situation.

Bottom line, they are not going anywhere anytime soon — so assess the problem, come up with solutions, and take action. Making believe that it will go away on its own is dangerous.

If you have any questions or issues with a multi-generational business, feel free to call me (203.500.2421) – would love to discuss and help you find a solution.

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Years ago, I came upon one of the most simple and powerful quotes I’ve ever read. It’s from Mohandas Gandhi, who in his 78 years of life, gave us so many great quotes (and his actions too!).

“Action Expresses Priorities.”

That’s it. That’s MY secret to getting things done.

Think about it — All of your actions, all the things you do, all the things you deliver — set your priorities. Once you take action, you instantly decide what you want to do first. Why? People tend to act upon those things that have meaning to them.

But I think it’s deeper than that. I think when you don’t know what to do, you need to just take action anywhere and suddenly certain things will start to fall into place.

But that’s the problem today — we don’t take action. We’re afraid to — we procrastinate, over-analyze, and postpone because we are sometimes afraid of action.

Because action will ensure we have to make a decision — we have to do something that is sometimes hard, or we will have to deal with the results of that action.

But what we don’t realize is that action moves us forward. It propels us . . . it forces us to rocket faster and faster. And sometimes we are afraid of that.

So ask yourself:

• How can I take action today?
• What should I do first? Second? Third?
• What should I stop doing?

So the next time you are putting off something — a decision, a task, a phone-call — just think “Action Expresses Priorities”.

Image provided by Ramkarthikblogger at Flickr.

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I received two emails the other day:

Executive Client: “Rich — I don’t know what to do — I feel like I’m an idiot! Every time I try to speak with some of my peers and my boss, it seems like I’m in slow motion, I know I have 20 years experience in the industry, but for some reason, they anticipate, decide, and outmaneuver me whenever I speak to them. Meetings are hell!”

Business Client: “OMG — my clients have me running rings around them for some reason! Every time I deliver something to them, they are 10 steps ahead of me requesting something else and adding ‘Why didn’t I do this . . . or that?’. I don’t know if it’s me or them. HELP!!”

Here’s a dirty little secret: It’s happened to me. It happens to EVERYONE. Quick thinkers are everywhere.

Here’s why:

#1. They are truly gifted.

There are people out there who are really smart. They have the ability to assess the situation, determine their choices, and choose the best direction.

They are a wonder to work with and for — because they usually cut through the BS and take action. My estimate: 10% of the population.

#2. They are in the know.

Bottom line — they know more than you. They have more information, they know how people work, they know who can do what, and they’ve probably done this before while it’s totally new to you. Or they are privy to information not disclosed to you.

You think they are better than you — but they’re just a few steps ahead (and running quite fast to stay there). My estimate: 50% of the population.

#3. They are fearless.

They are supremely confident in their decision making and don’t have that small trigger most people possess to stop and think about a situation.

This comes in handy during an emergency (like a car crash) where quick, fearless thinking saves the day. It is a ticking time bomb when it comes to strategic business decisions. My estimate: 20% of the population.

#4. They are faking it.

These are the hidden land mines in business.These people have low self-esteem and probably a personality disorder. They make assumptions and decisions so quickly it makes your head spin.

In addition, if you question them, their logic to back up their decision is unassailable in their eyes, while you go batty trying to understand their logic. Black is white — up is down. It’s maddening.

Next time you are stymied by a quick thinker, try to diagnose who they really are.

Genius — Stick with them and do what they do.
Knowledgable — Catch up to them, learn more.
Fearless — Think strategically and double back.
Fake — Stick to your guns if logic is on your side.

POST YOUR QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS BELOW

P.S. Having a hard time with a quick thinker? Let’s talk.  Business and executive clients bring this subject up frequently. If you’re not a client . . . grab your spot now before the final spot for October is taken. Only one left — time is getting short!
 

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Decisions or the lack of them are responsible for the breaking or making of many a career.

With the craziness of the economy mixed with the bi-polar swings of board decisions, one finds it harder and harder to make a ‘comfortable’ decision.

So you procrastinate. You succumb to inertia and hope for the best. You deflect, you misdirect. But the decisions still hangs there . . . and it’s starting to smell bad.

Some decisions are hard. Some are easy. Some are complex. And some are frustratingly simple.

But they all have an end-game . . . each decision hangs all on you. It’s your responsibility and your head if things go south.

But here’s the simple truth — in most cases — not making a decision is almost as bad (and sometimes worse) than making a decision.

So here’s my ‘easy-peasy, lemon-squeezy’ technique to make decisions:

1. Take out a clean sheet of paper and pen.
2. List the decision. Keep it simple. Like: “Cut Costs or Reduce Staff”.
3. Write down one major reason FOR each side of the decision.
   • FOR: Cut Costs – get more frugal and focused on delivery.
   • FOR: Reduce Staff – cut out cyphers/troublemakers. Simplify projects.
4. Write down one major reason AGAINST each side of the decision.
   • AGAINST: Cut Costs – more complaining, excuses abound.
   • AGAINST: Reduce Staff – everyone is scared; they shut down.
5. Score using Effort & Impact – how much effort will it take and what is the impact? Keep it simple use 1-3 stars as a scoring system.
6. The secret – during this process, you will begin to gravitate to a decision and also (hopefully) have the facts to back it up.

Granted, some of your decisions will be more complex and involve a lot more introspection, but I maintain one should always endeavor to keep most decisions simple and straightforward. Simplify!

What do you do to make tough decisions (when you can’t ask anyone for input) easier?

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“I don’t know what to do.”
“I’m stuck, which way should I turn?”
“I’m procrastinating because I don’t know what will bite me.”

This happens all the time to everyone at their workplace. EVERYONE.

Unfortunately, most people are paranoid of everything falling apart or failing IF they make a critical decision.

When I work with clients (who range from CEO’s to Solopreneurs), I help them understand there are only three scenarios:

1. Things will get better. (sometimes much better)
2. Things will stay the same.
3. Things will get worse.
4. Or the world will veer from it’s axis and we will all die.

I usually comment: If you then make a decision and you use my model, 2 of the 3 are either good or average. One is bad.

I don’t know about you, but I like the odds.

Most people focus on the bad (or worse). All the time.

To increase your chances of hitting the upper end of the curve or lessening the lower end, try to mitigate certain unknowns.

Here’s a typical example:

Apple is launching a new iPad into the marketplace in the next few weeks. (Yea!)

1. It either will be a hit and sell more than the iPad 1.
2. It will match the sales of the iPad 1.
3. Due to increase competition, or other factors, it will sell less than the iPad 1.

Now Steve Jobs, Jonathan Ive and a host of other Apple troops are out in force mitigating the last scenario.

They’ve done their market testing. They’ve surveyed the marketplace.
They’ve got info on their competition and a host of other mitigating behaviors. They’ve done their homework.

Most of the time, your homework is to sit down and clearly think about the results of your decision. Understand most (not all) of the permutations – what might happen. And develop alternatives if things go awry. But also think about the positive and average scenarios too. Doing this will make it easier.

And then make the decision. “Lose your sleep before your decision, not after it.”

What hard decisions do you have to make? Does this model work for you?

Image provided by katietower at Flickr.

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Today, I promised you HOW they do it.

In the movie Fight Club (a male perennial favorite like ‘The Godfather’), the lead character works for an auto company and spouts out a formula they use for deciding whether to recall a model of their car or just let it go on killing people:

“Take the number of vehicles in the field, (A), and multiply it by the probable rate of failure, (B), then multiply the result by the average out-of-court settlement, (C). A times B times C equals X . . . If X is less than the cost of a recall, we don’t do one.”

It’s a scary formula — but an apt example of how one should look critically at a decision. When I coach my clients, it comes down to three choices:

1. Do nothing.
2. Do something slightly different.
3. Change radically (move or something totally new).

You need to stay ahead of the curve. So if you do nothing, eventually the marketplace is going to catch up to you and pass you pretty quickly. If you do something slightly different, you’re just staving off the inevitable, it’s catching up soon.

If you move or change your model radically, you stay ahead of the curve. Although you might be at the burning edge of the marketplace or your career path, you still are 100% in control of your destiny.

Your career or business needs to follow a Sigmoid Curve (see image above). The secret to constant growth is to start a new sigmoid curve before the first one peters out. The right place to start that second curve is at a point (A) where there is time, as well as the resources and energy, to get the new curve through its initial explorations and floundering before the first curve begins to dip downward (B).

And that’s what it’s all about. Maintaining complete control over what you do, where you go, and what happens to you.

It’s your choice: If you let things happen to you, you are at the whim of management or the marketplace. If you take control and make decisions about your future, you have a little bit more say in the direction of your journey.

“Stop waiting for life to happen to you and begin to direct your life and explore your limits.” – Rich Gee

Extra Credit: Here’s a real-life example:
Years ago, I worked with one of the most energetic, positive, and professional executives I’ve ever met. He was a pleasure to interact with, always moving forward, always getting things done. In fact, both he and I won the organization’s highest award that year. We were going places — and in less than a few months, he was gone, off to another position at another company. In fact, he’s done it successfully throughout his career. Today, he’s the CEO of a Fortune 500 company. Fancy that.

Me? I do what I love too. Every single day.

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Good To Great. An incredible book by Jim Collins — relates how certain companies overcame their obstacles and pushed themselves from being just good companies to the stars of their industry. It chronicles how they made the leap, what they did, and what they didn’t do.

How can you make the leadership leap with your team and go from just being a good leader (and that isn’t bad) to a great leader? Here are some basic qualities most leaders use and how to kick each one up a notch to great:

Integrity

When was the last time you really assessed YOUR performance? Do you stand by what you say? I’d like you to think back to three major or difficult decisions you had to make over the past year and review how did you make them? What was the result? Do you feel that you stayed true to your ethics and that your decision grew you as a leader in your organization?

Vision & Planning

How much of your time is focused on looking forward? Not just a few days or weeks, but months and years? How much of your time do you actually design personalized visions for your team — where you see them going?

Communication

Persuasion, Motivation, & Coaching

Adaptability

Decision-making

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“Why did they go with the other candidate?”
“Why am I not getting that promotion?”
“Why did I get laid off?”

It’s the balance of factual and emotional and how we also balance them in our head and heart.

Unfortunately, we often tend to skew on the emotional side when it comes to highly personal and influential decisions. As I say to my clients, “You tell yourself stories.”

You need to evaluate the FACTUAL side of the equation and you’ll probably see why and how they made the decision.

Why do I mean by facts? Follow the money, perception, situation, and influencers. They are probably to blame.

On the other hand – there are situations when the people in charge make emotional decisions and let facts fly in the wind.

Candidly, you don’t want to work for them. Trust me.

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